"I Pledge"

Have you seen the new "Pledge" put out by supporters of President Obama? Take a look at: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wqcPA1ysSbw. I've watched it a few times, and it inspired me to write my own version as a response. So here's my "new pledge:"

I pledge never to listen to "Hollywood celebrities" (who cannot even control their own lives) when they try to tell me how to live my life.

I pledge to take down a whole bunch of trees in my yard, cut them up for firewood, and burn them mercilessly in my fireplace so my family can keep warm.

I pledge to top off my gas tank at 12 noon during the hottest days of the summer.

I pledge to barbeque plenty of bloody raw meat on my back yard grill as often as I can.

I pledge to cut my grass using the most gasoline-sucking lawn-mowers--during the hottest time of the day--especially during "ozone action alert" days.

I pledge to expose the fraud of man-made global warming as often as possible.

I pledge to never support worthless organizations sponsored by the UN, and to do everything I can to help charities that actually do help impoverished people (organizations such as Samaritan's Purse, International Aid, or Compassion International).

I pledge to support non-partisan organizations that promote life, liberty, the right to own property, free markets, a strong national defense, enforcement of our borders, free speech, gun rights, the 10th Amendment, traditional marriage, and other "crazy ideas" that are currently under attack by our culture and government.

I pledge to serve my country by preserving, protecting, and defending the Constitution of the United States of America--against all enemies foreign or domestic.